This is my story

2008-06-16T23:51:00.004+08:00

ARE WE THERE YET???

One of the biggest highlight of been in a command school is jungle orientation, armed with only a map and a compass. Though saddist instructors will want you to be armed with webbing, rifle, and many other dead weights.

And so we were taught how to read a map, how to locate streams that are unmark in the map. how to, with the help of a compass and a protractor on the map, to lead ourselves out of 'lost-ness'.

And after days of the theory lesson, it's time to get our hands on and dirty. we were brought to the different knolls to try out hands on how to use a compass, point out of to the other knolls with the help of a map.

And when we were ready, it's time for some action. We were brought to the middle of the Mandai Nature Reserve. And we walked all over the place while our sergeant watch from behind. We picked up pointers from our sergeants and we memorise all of them. Because the second time round, we'll be on our own. With us in Mandai, was the trainees from the Charlie company, it's their second time and therefore, they are alone. And we know that one of the detail they have broken up to 2 groups on their own. It's not allowed, but some think that that will help increase the chances of finding a check point.

And this particular detail could not find each other back. They were shouting for each other. My sergeant soon got fed up. And yelled at them to be quiet. And sure they did.

The hours went by and our sergeant still pushed us on, covering almost every square inch. The fact that i was the one carrying the signal set did not help too. Night came and we became the mosquito's food, but we moved on, i dropped my rifle magazine after i trip over a tree root but we still moved on. While crossing a stream, one of my section mate fell of a make shift bridge made up of a fallen tree brunch, but we moved on.

By the time we finally got back to our make shift command post, we were all too tired for anything, we slept the moment we sat down. As for me and one other section mate of mine, We fall in together with the rest when the sergeants called out for platoon 1 to fall in.

As i fell in together with the rest, a female sergeant told me to put on my helmet. Her voice was so sweet, and soft. So different from the other loud talking male sergeants. If only i was a trainee in Charlie company.

Then i woke up, realising that the two of us had fall in the wrong company. We admited our mistake, and staggered back to our Bravo company, with the damn signal set still on my back.

Sweet dreams really do not last long.

2008-06-07T16:54:00.002+08:00

And so we moved on from BMT. With the basic knowledge of soldiering skills, we marched on to our new posting.

I was now posted to the BSLC course in SISPEC, confident that i will not be as dumb as i was when i was just a recuit. But only time will tell.

On my first day in BSLC, once the bunking in and other admin stuffs is done my company had to conduct a run all around the camp, the gigantic Pasir Lebar camp. We ran to all the other companies in SISPEC, the other units that also reside in Pasir Leba camp, all the cook house, the 2.4km route. And the sergeants told us that we were lucky that the OC decided not to take us to the obstacle course training field.

After a quick dinner, we procced to memorise the SISPEC song. And the sergeants won't leave us until we can sing out the entire song, loudly.

It was already night when we finally memorised the song by heart. But even so, the sergeants won't dismiss us. They conducted our 'before course' interview. After a long time, it was my turn to go in. And my interviewing sergeant offered me a biscuit. I had to obey, no choice. By that time, i was too tired from the morning rush to get admin things done, the late afternoon runs and the night sing-song session. Half-way through the interview, i fell asleep.

I gest you not. Sleep. And this is where i realised that sergeant had the voice the decibel level of a brand new alarm clock.

Only to learn on the second day that he, the ex-commando man is to be my section sergeant.

2008-06-07T00:11:00.002+08:00

Much of the rest of my BMT life pass off un-noticed, un-remembered, possibly because we recurits have grown up to be a better solider. We know more things and therefore, make less mistake, and that means, less screwing from our sergeants.

And sooner than we know, we have passed out as recuits. We are now known as dumb privates. Anyway, we organised a bbq-chalet at Downtown East where the whole of my platoon is invited. And instinctively 3 groups were formed. The super majong kings, those with girlfriends, and the nice guys.

The super majong kings, as the name says, comes to the chalet, goes straight to the air-con room, and plays majong. Non-stop. Not even to eat or drink, not even to pee. Cash is at stake here. Only to realise that their cars have been summoned by the car park wardens.

The next group of them is those with girlfriends. Some of the privates came down to the chalet with their girlfriends in tow. They would cluster together, gather at a bench and talk in a well behaved manner while their girlfriends will happily chat amoung themselves.

The final group of privates is the good guys, they are the ones who organise the whole thing, buy all the foods, cook them, and serve them out onto trays. But these good guys and not under privileged here as you may think. They keep the best cooked foods for themselves to enjoy, they enjoyed toasted garlic hot dog buns with premium sausages while the rest had to be contended with burnt chicken wings and frozen chicken frank's sausages. They had warm satay sauces to dip their satays into while the rest had only cold ones. Ha!

Once the bbq had ended and the mess cleared, alcohol flowed in, the majong ones drank the most. The ones with girfriends drank moderately. While the good guys rested their tummies and indulged in soft drinks.

My friend i however, took our bike for a spin down changi village and to the changi point park connector. My bike, been the rented one of course.

The second day of our chalet was much like any other chalet and therefore, need not much commenting.

HA!

2008-05-19T00:22:00.003+08:00

Friend: No you can't do that.
Me: Yes i can. If We can pack a pack 2, i believe i can do this.

Pack 2 is one of the pack that you will need to put into your field pack. And it is the sheer sound of the words "pack 2" could send one's spine shivering. It consist of one thick and big green army towel, two pairs of underwears, two pairs of socks, a pair of shorts and a admin t-shirt. All squezzed into a medium size zip-lock. Each time i pack a pack 2, i just had to burst at least 2 zip-locks bags while packing. It was so diffcult packing it, any attempts to remove the contents of other personel's pack 2 will result only in violence.

Mean while during the conversation, i was trying to pack my No. 4 shirt and pants into a clear handle-less plastic bag. The kind where you can get them absoutely free from the fruits, vegetables and the fish sections.

And, i did it. and proudly present my wonder work to my friend. Ever since then, i've been using those kind of plastic bags to carry my dirty clothing home from camp. And just a little tip, the ones at tampines giant are the largest. Haha.

Anyway, the point is, nothing is impossible in the army. There are even cases of trainees not been able to tell between east and west.

Even the mosquitos in the army had their never say die attitude. They can poke through your uniforms and feed themselves to your blood.

2008-05-17T22:12:00.003+08:00

IT'S IN YOU

After a few weeks in the army, you really begin to lose your sense of been a civilan. And you begin to gain new found sense of been a soldier. Whether it's at the movies, beaches, or any shopping malls.

Here's a little list of things of how you know your life has indeed began to militarised.

- You begin to pack wet or dirty clothes into medium sized zip-lock bags when you are at the beach.

- When you go to your neighbourhood gym, you start to do the 10 basic weighted exercise.

- You start using black tape to seal your tin of buttered cookies.

- You stop using clear tape. Because you believe in the ultimate power of black tape.

- You realise that beach road food center is the place where ass holes to show off their hot girlfriends.

- You forgot what a knife is. You have already master the art of the fork and spoon. And even instinctively uses a fork and spoon only to eat your steak while in jack's places.

- You forgot about the availability of buses and began walking from marina center to plaza singapura without a tiny bit of sweat.

- You stop buying new clothes. Except stricity only just before chinese new year.

- When in a cable car, you thought you were in a helicopter.

- You can't read the street directory or any map without a compass.

- You began waking up at 5:30am sharp everyday even on your own bed and without an alarm clock.

- You bring the amazing art of area cleaning to your own home.

- The displaying photos in their frame inside your room has changed to become photographs of you in mailtary fatigues.

Fulfill any 5 of the above and you know that your mind has been militarised by army.

2008-05-17T17:22:00.003+08:00

Happy is the soldier who knows no fear.

Happy is the soldier who doesn't knows what the word 'afraid' is.

Happy is the soldier who is fit and muscular.

Happy is the soldier who loves out-field.

Happy is the soldier who worries nothing.

Happy is the soldier who finally gets to attend his ORD blood test.

But fearful is the soldier when he realises the brand-new, green horn medic starts to misses your blood veins when he poke his needle in.

2008-05-10T18:08:00.002+08:00

STARY STARY NIGHT (PART 3)

We now had reach the third and final camp site in our 7 days long field camp. Where out mental stregth was tested to the limits.

We had to dig our own shell scrape. It had to be the same length as our body and the same width as our body. And we had to dig a additional hole for our field packs. For at least 3 persons; one of my friend, my bed side buddy, and me had to dig beside a tree, and all we did was not digging a hole. It's removing tree roots. Lot's of them. For one other unlucky guy, he dug up a whole ant nest.

We dig, we dug, we dugged. And soon, it was very dark. And we were forced to abandoned our hole to have our dinner. Along the way, some of us fell into holes. And while having dinner under the light of the picnic lantern, me and four others panic when we realised that we were not carring our own rifle.

After our dinner and our usual powder bath, we were told to go back to sleep in our own hole. Yes, there were all sorts of bugs in my hole. But as my eyes refused to stay open, i decided to sleep in and wait for my sentry shift.

Sooner than i expected, my shift came. and all through out my shift, my buddy and i began to practise the art of sleeping while standing. But since i have been practising that in the mornings of every monday till friday in the north-east line since my poly days, i naturally fared much better than my buddy.

Soon, our week long field camp came to an end. We finally realised how wonderful the ride of a 5 tonner is, how colourful the colour our barrack line building is, how good the cook house food is, how beautiful our toilet bowl is, the power of hand phones, and the wonders of music from your mp3.

Whatever it is, immediately after our shower, a sizeable squad of men from my platoon, this includes me, fall-in and moved off to the medical centre to report sightings of rashes forming up on various parts or our bodies.

2008-05-10T17:39:00.002+08:00

STARY STARY NIGHT (PART 2)

After the night attack, our OC went to inspect our tents, and our cooking area. Fortuntely, due to our quick thinking sergeants, damages was kept to a miniumal. After the inspection, he gatered the whole company to give us a good lecture.

"Last night attacks was due to your lack of house keeping. There were food particles everywhere..... bla bla bla......"

So we had a good clean up everywhere.

Only to have realised that we are moving off our our next camp site on the same day.

Soon, we reached our campsite and the first thing that came to everyone's mind was to answer the call of nature. In waves, recuits went ahead to shit at a open patch of land. My friend and i, however, decided to walk a little more, cross a drain and have a peaceful shit while all the other recuits fight for space at that open patch of land.

To everyone's horror, that darn open patch of land was our designated practical training area.

Anyway, by now, most recuits have decided to shit everyday rather than to control the shit. Been said so, my friend and i decided to shit again on our second night at our second camp site. The shit holes at the toilet point was full by now. So we had no choice but to find else where to shit. We thought a little and decided that since that that we will be moving out of this camp site for good the next morning, we decided to shit at that same open patch of land that was our training area for the past 2 days. We knew that the sides of the training area will be littered by the recuits 2 days old shit. so we diceded to shit in the center of the training area.

We first grab our ET sticks and blade, dug two holes, took out our remaining solid fuel, and light up a little fire in front of the two holes. And we answered our nature's call by the fire light, As we looked up, we were taken aback by the most beautiful star littered sky we had ever seen in singapore.

It was indeed, the most romantic shit i ever had in my life.

2008-05-10T16:33:00.002+08:00

STARY STARY NIGHT (PART 1)

Yes, it's your first out-field. No training is complete without out-field. And we started off with a 8km route march. In full combat load, with camo cream on our face. By the time we reached our first camp site, the green and black cream on my face are completely gone. we settled down to pitch our tents and dig a small drainage around the perimeter of our tent. But because of our shaggness. the drainage was no more than 1 cm deep and a mere 2 cm wide.

We then had our lunch. Lunch was served in a green packet. If your green packet contain rice, it will be as sticky as any rice dumpling. If your green packet contains noodles instead, it will be the thickest and most soggy noodle you ever had in your life. If your green packet writes "chicken pontage rice", good luck to you.

By and large, green food packets are the most salty food you will have ever tasted. I can finish one whole green water bottle after just one meal of the salty food. Green packet food taste good on the first day because it's new, and exciting. But as the days goes on, the same food gets more and more disguesting, especially the smell of them all. Trainees of all religon, creed and race rather live on the biscuts and fruit bars also provided instead. And before long, trainees will discuss amoung themselves, ways to get rid of their green food packets. The best solution so far, is to bring your green packets to the toilet point, open up the packet, dump the food into the shit hole, and bring back the empty packets to show to your sergeants happily at the next meal time.

Anyway, after our lunch, we had many theory lessons of survial in the jungle, tactical movement, fire movement and lots more. It was early evening when our lessons has finally ended and we proceded for our evening stand-to. And finally, we were allowed to start cooking our maggie mee. To cook, we first need to dig a small hole, place 2 pieces of solid fuel into the hole, light it, and have fun cooking your noodles and hot super 3-in-1 coffee, lipton tea, nestle's milo and what ever you had in your combat rations. Not long after, we started to enjoy ourselves with our little mini camp fires all over the cooking area and hastily put out the fires and left only when we got yelled at by our sergeants.

Soon, the sky became pitch dark, next up, we had powder bath. We formed up in platoon level and drown ourselves in powder and changed into clean uniforms for meant for sleeping only. Been said so, we soon went to sleep. Then disaster strucked.

We were raided by wild boars.

Whole tents was dismantled food stolen, and field packs bitten and man-handled by the wild boars. And they don't alone. They came as a family, There was three cute little pigglets, and infront of them, was two extremly big boars. They bashed through the constantina wires that was been placed all round the perimeter of the company's camp site and wreaked havoc. Sergeants threw flash bangs at them, recuits yelling all over the place, and soon the family of pigs left. Only to have another forced intrusion at another part of the camp site. This went on all through the night and before long, my buddy and i decided to sleep through the commotion and have a fresh start tomorrow. After all, if you don't disturb the boars, the boars won't disturb you too.

Not long after lying down on the ground inside our tent, huge grunting sound was heard, it came from behind my head, and it was very loud. I tilted up my head so that my eyes was looking at the back of me.

And there it was, a big bad wild boar sniffing all over my field pack.

2008-05-10T13:30:00.004+08:00

ROUTE MARCH

One of the core trainings in SAF when one is a trainee. What started off as just a 1.5km march soon grew to 8km, den 16km, 24km and finally 28km.

It's not just about walking and walking with full combat load. There's a whole lot of other skills one must achive before going the walk. Or suffer the consequences. Of course, first up, the most basic thing of singing of songs together, i believe this is the army's only other alternative of entertaining one self since we are not allowed to listen to MP3 while on the march.

There are just so much songs to sing. Remembering them all just makes one dizzy. It is therefore, no surprise when one got the lyrics all mixed up. Here's one example:

Booking out, see my girlfriend.
Saw her with, my CSM.
Bash him up.
Win back my girlfriend,
With my rifle, my buddy and meeeeeeeee.

Luckily, we did not sing out loud enough, i guess heads will roll along the dirt track on which we marched on.

Of course, since route march is a very strenuous exercise, we were been conducted a water parade once every 4km. This is to ensure everyone is well hydrated so that no one will get a chance to suffer from hear exhaustion. Which, i realised, gives some of us a problem of another kind.

I was marching in the middle of my platoon when i said "shit, when's it ending". The guy beside me, instinctively cheered me on with lots of encouragement. Of course, with lots of the following words of: 'endure', 'almost there', 'don't shag', 'reaching soon already'. And all those while, no one asked me what my problem was. Not long after, the guys behind me started cheering and encouraging me on. But i could endure no longer, i took a step out of my platoon, take another step out of the road and onto the grass, undo one fly button, and had a good pee. There was so much urine in me that the rear sergeant and the rear scout of my platoon stopped beside me and waited for me to finish my pee. However, there was just too much urine in my bladder. By the time i was finally done, the first men from the next platoon had already caught up with us. And the three of us had to run back to our own platoon.

With new burst of energy which i had achived after my long pee, i joined in the platoon sing along session with fresh burst of energy, strength and pride.

As i moved on to sispec, i had to do a 28km route march on the day before our POP. We started moving out late in the night, only to return back to the parade square the next morning for our parade. Being more experienced than recuits we marched on with ease. And for a long time, nothing happened. Slowly but surely, the inevitable shag start to kick in. Nearly every platoon in every company started to break up. We started to close up and march with pride not from our sergeants yelling, but at the presence of hot pretty girls jogging down the road. Amazing? yes it's true, we were marching right through NTU at that time. Then we went out ot NTU and back to the forest, and soon, the return journey. We started to march through NTU again. But by this time, every NTU student was asleep in their dorm. And because of the nature of the surroundings, we were not allowed to engage in our usual sing along sessions. One by one, we started to fall asleep and into dream land on the march. Waking up only when falling of the roadside pathway and onto the road. Or onto the drains at the other side of the roadside pathway. For me, i fell onto the road three times. As for one my friend, he managed not to fall off the roadside pathway, all throughout that sleepy stretch of the NTU route. He even managed to make a detour around the tree which he nearly crashed onto at the enterance of the campus.

Only to crash right in the middle of the medium sized, 2 pole supporting "Welcome to NTU" sign board. And fell to the ground at last of course.

Well, after that 28km route march, we had our POP, followed by breakfast, a quick rest, followed by cleaning of our rifles while the other companies was sound asleep. Of course, nearly everyone, or at least in my platoon, fell asleep along our company line with rifle parts and ferolite in our hands.

2008-05-04T21:42:00.005+08:00

AHEM..... COUGH!

During our stay in tekong, were were introduced the cough virus. It's a wet cough variant where by you cough out yellow phlegm. Where ever you go, whatever you do, it will always be there. And this is the reason why it takes ages to see the MO in tekong. It's not just your company, but other companies as well. It's also not just your batch, but all other batches as well.

Many different people has come up with many different reason fr the cause of this virus. Some common speculation is that wet clothes were hung inside the bunk, therefore, tiny water droplets amoung the air in the bunk get breath into out lungs while we sleep. Another common reason is that we are staying very very close to the sea, therefore, the air has lots of water droplets which was breath into out lungs during the night. Even the water cooler was suspected. It's filter was not cleaned regularly, therefore, it breeds all kinds of baterica at a great amount and that we drink all the bacteria. Another one is that it gets too hot in the day and it gets too cold in the night, therefore, our delicate city breed lungs are not strong enough to withstand the great temperature change. Therefore, the cough.

Whatever the reason is, it does have a impact. During our daily night RO, the RO was read out with lots of coughing in the background. For every PT lesson or drill lessons, there is enough attn B personels in the company to form a platoon 5. Wherever you go, someone will be coughing. Without fail.

And they spread very easily. Here's a true account of one such case that happened to me.

I had that cough and went to see the MO. Since then, for everyday, 3 times a day, i had to take medicine for my cough and the phlegm. And i took my cough syrup with the table spoon i took secretly from the cook house and kept it in my cupboard. And soon, it came to a situation where my buddy got hungary one night and cook a packet of instant noodles to eat. Without a fork or a spoon of his own, he borrowed my fork and the very spoon that i used to eat my cough syrup with. Despite my warning, he still took it and used it for his meal claiming that his immune system is strong.

The very next day, he had the cough and soon needed to see the MO.

Soon after, my cough got for the better while his cough got bad. And one day during IFC training, my same buddy's water bottle ran out of water and brrowed my water bottle to drink from it. After drinking from it, he returned it to me and i put it back in my own SBO. Not long after, i grew thirsty and became too tired to think. Been so, i unknowing took out that waterbottle that i shared with my buddy eariler to have a drink from it.

The very next day, i had the cough and soon needed to see the MO. Again.

Such were the power of the tekong cough. One natural remedy for it is to drink a hot drink every night before bed time. It warms up the lungs and keep you healthy. Though it was just another myth, i took the advice anyway and did it faithfully every night and it does seems to work.

2008-05-03T22:07:00.002+08:00

IS IT CLEAN

One things all army personel hates is inspection. Everything can be inspected, area inspection, toilet, bunk, bed, rifle, vehicle, even the water coolers is included.

Pity the recuits allcoated to clean the toilets. Because nothing in the toilet can be perfected, toilet cleaners build the most arm musscles during their time in tekong. This includes me. The toliet IC. Perfectly clean includes, a dry floor, dry basin, no cock hairs in the urinals, bla bla bla. But beyond that, the fan need to be cleaned of dust, the offices need to be clean of dust, our cupboard need to be clean of dust, tables and chairs need to clean of dust, outside, the drive way need to be swept clear of leaves, the drains need to be swept clear of leaves, the baskat ball court need to be swept clear of leaves, the train shed need to be swept clear of leaves.

Only to have dust and leaves appearing all over the same place we all cleaned the day before. We cursed and sweared, but they still keep appearing back again, and again, and again.

Even the heavens despise us recuits. Once the dirt and leaves are under control, they are inspected by the sergeants or officers. During that time, dirt and leaves will surely appear out of no where.

2008-05-03T21:36:00.003+08:00

PARADES

This is the one thing army loves to have. And there all sorts of parade, national day parades, COC parades, CO parades, POP parades, mastur parades, SAF day parades, staff parades, turn-out parades, water parades.

Water parades are one of a kind. We were shout out the seven SAF core vaules, followed by the words drink up, and finally, drink up the whole water bottle of water. The first time we did this, we urined at a rate more often than babies. We did it in the morning, at night, before and after exercises, during route marches, all the time. Imagine visting the toilet frequently in the night to pee and still had to not let your sergeant catch you not sleeping in your bed.

Mastur parades are still a mystery to me, done only once in my life while i was a trainee in SISPEC. And my company does it with style. This was how it goes. My company was made to fall in with SBO and helmet, FAD and ID tag and our rifle too. Then we were soon made to form up in the leader's square without all those items. The other BSLC companies soon joined us. Together, we had a flag raising. Followed by a short speech and a quick prize cememory. When everything was done, My company was told to put on our SBO, helmet, rifle, and after making sure we had FAD abd ID tag too, we pulled down our sleeves and immdiately marched off.

To our playground, the well loved SOC.

2008-05-03T17:41:00.003+08:00

HAIR CUT, ANYONE?

EC, QB, and all other 10 minutes hair cut barber shops can cut your hair at an affordable cost of just $10. However, a hair cut in tekong cost you just $2 and finishes the job in just seconds!

We recuits, was introduced rudely, the legendary tekong barber.

We were first seated onto a chair, then we took off our grey army t-shirts and the barber shaves our hair in just a few good strokes. This was done with force, to the extend that we thought that the electric shaver was plucking out our hair instead. Yes although most of the barbers are made up of young ladies, the sheer size of them all doesn't bring you any comfort. At all, period. Without forgetting also the occascional times when lumps of hair gets jammed into the electric shavers and the ladies tried to rectify it by using again, by force.

Immediately the hair cut, we went to an open area with brushes to brush off our hair off our heads and body.

Some of the recuits, however did not bring any small change for that legendary hair cut and thus, had to boerrow that 2 bucks from other fellow recuits. After the hair cut, they were at a lost. They did not who they borrowed from. Everyone look alike.

Subsequently, we were made to go through this painful process at a rate of once a month. That is when our hair grows approximately at a length about 1cm. Such was the length or our hair that we were able to observe our hairs growing. Most of the recuits, for 2 months, save a tidy sum of money by not using shampoos altogether and laughed madly at fellow recuits who still wanted to use shampoos.

The tekong hair style, or so we call it, had it's advantages. It's perfect for wearing helmets without worrying about hair fringes sticking out from the front side of the helmet. We need not worry about dirt trapping and getting buried into our hair. Dirt on a recuits hair can be easily be wash off by just water or even powder. there were just so many advantages to list.

Best of all, we stand out among the crowds. In the movies, game arcades, and of course, sentosa.

2008-05-01T22:21:00.006+08:00

WELCOME

What was the first thing that happened to you when you first step into pulau tekong?

For me, and the many other luckless guys around, we attended a lesson of shouting appreciation. The importance of shouting and how to adapt it. And a recuits' journey sure depends on it. We reply to anybody by shouting, your CSM shouting commands, and bla bla bla. We even pledge our loyalty to singapore by shouting out the pledge. Soon after that shouting apprecitation lesson, we were shown a touching video about life in wonderful tekong. With the song 'time of your life' by greenday playing in the background, we saw lots of smiles, joy, and happiness amoung the recuits and instructors alike.

Anyway, we had a nice lunch of chicken rice and soon, our parents left tekong for home. Via the penguin express of course.

We were soon issued our uniforms, sort out wrong sizes, had dinner, and were sent to sleep in our bunks. At 10:30 pm, the time of the day when our mind was at it's most active state.

We tossed, we turned, we went to the toilet, we even counted sheeps. But we just couldn't sleep. We even tried to hide under the blanket to sneek out sms'es to love ones and friends, usually female friends.

In the end, all of us managed to fall asleep. Only to be woken up 5:15am, that's the time when most teenagers would start to fall asleep. We all went fully awake when told to fall in by 5:30am. For most of my recuit days, i brushed my teeth only after we came back from breakfast.

And this is where my very interesting life as a solider begins. Next up, will be a collection of all my mis-adventures during our famed national service, collected since 8th june 2006.

2007-03-04T13:19:00.000+08:00

AND SO IT CAME

School training has fnally ended. And the 06 june batch of entlistees (spec) has been posted into various units. Now we can only look back to all the cocks we had done, all the screw ups we did. And the birthday bash we had together.

From today, Yishun will be my second home. Or rather my first. I'll be at Yishun for 5 days a week and Hougang only during the weekends.

Life in that camp is still the same. There is only one girl at the technician side, and the the rest of the entire camp is guys.

I still see the guy who complains of too much female friends and the guy who still bug others to intro their female friends / sisters to him.

I still get into "almost" situtations. Most recent is my IPPT test. I could get a gold. But during my 2.4km run, i lost my gold by just 2 seconds. And an extra $100. Talk about gone in 2 seconds.

I was, one day, 'strongly encouraged' to go to a chinese new dinner with 4 others by my CWO. My table is filled by another 5 persons from the C3 side. and 3 of them were girls, 1 was attached, 1 seems to be attached, the last one is an obese, confirmed is a single. What happened during during the dinner is really worth to know. The obese girl flirted with one of my friends. She didn't even considered me. Of course, i was naturally depressed.

Even an obese girl didn't want me.

2007-02-16T23:49:00.000+08:00

IT'S THE CHAIN

There are the good officers. They will guide you, they will bring you up when you fall, they will be there for you. These officers exists through-out the ranks of the officers, from an NSF 2nd lieutenant to a Regular lieutentant colonel (from what i have seen so far).

And there are officers who command respect. Even if they clearly don't deserve it. It pains me to see an extremely experienced and good warrant officer having to salute a comissioned officer of such character.

Maybe those "bad" officers meant well for their actions. But one thing for sure is that temper brings down the reputation of the one who lose it.

Officers who make use of their men to show off their capbilities are also the one who is comdemed.

The one who leads by example is respected, the one who uses his rank as a dozer blade is hated. You can't expected to be respected if you are eating cilivian food if the rest of the men is eating combat rations.

No i'm not an officer. I am a specialist trainee. But the attitude of the officer will affect the morale of the specialist. In turn, the attitude of the specialist will affect the morale of the men.

My morale this past week at out-field is at an especially low level. Even the drivers didn't like my commanding officer.

But inside news is that the higher ups didn't like him either.

But what ever it is, the lesson learnt is about earning a little thing called respect. Take that extra step out, lead with actions and not by words. Show your men respect if you want the same treatment.

Stop that chain of "Because i had takan so i must pass it to you".

And whwe it happens, SAF will be a better place.

2007-02-11T00:13:00.000+08:00

HI, WE ARE A LOCAL, AND A TOURIST

This is a story of 4 singaporeans bringing 2 burieans out on a Sentosa trip. As locals, we ought to know all about Sentosa.

But as our civilian lives became faded, we became tourist instead. For a start we went up the wrong elevator while going to the boarding area of the cable car. And even in the elevator, the floor indicator just flashes "1", "2", "3", then "15". So while the number turned "15". One of us went dumb enough to say, "Oh, so fast 15th floor already ah". This caused the many people inside the elevator to control their laughter.

As army men, our military lives became stronger by the day. Uptill a point where a cable car can become a helicopter. One of us pretended to be a load-master, signaling us to hook up and prepare to jump off while talking to the pilot throught the headset attached to a helmet. This actually happen as the cable-car was just above the shore line of the sentosa island.

And down at the Sentosa island itself, we instinctively tried to align the map to the north. Only to realise that we don't have a compass with us.

But the rest of the Sentosa was interesting. It was not the usual beach only Sentosa outing. But it wasn't cheap either. Up till now, i dared not and will not calculate how much i had spend on this one single day alone.

But of course, this is sure a good way of bringing a love one out. Espcially since V-day is just around the corner. A pity that i'm still strongly a single. But i'm determined to find a love soon.

And when the day ended, we each parted way to different destinations, for me and 2 others, we went to play a computer game at a lan shop. This was the idea of one of the 2, (a game addicted guy), because he was too excited to play his new favourite game called "Company of Heros" with other people.

So The arrangement became that he and another guy played as "Allies" and i played as "Axis". So through out the game, i was playing against 2 players who are by default allied to each other. Of course i lost. But i made sure i wasn't trashed. I gave the allies a good beating before i was finally defeated.

But this game game wasn't any ordinary C&C game. This is something that reflects reality. An example is that infantary men just can't give any damage to armoured vehicles. Unlike in red aleart where by a rifle men can cake out even the heaviest of battle tanks.

But enough said. This games clearly reflects that technology cannot defeat numbers. i was defeated by sheer numbers. And the darn snipers.

2006-12-08T22:13:00.000+08:00

DE JA VU!

I first step into Air Force School at the year 2000 as a NCC Air cadet as a cadet specialist. Never did i expect that 6 years later i'll end up at the very same place as a trainee.

I nearly died trying to memorise many different types of aircraft back in NCC Air. Luckily, i did it and mastered it. But never did i expect that 6 years later, i'll be doing this very same thing again. But this time, it's now in an "eye test format".

In 1998, i joined NCC Air because my school did not offer NCC Sea. Now in 2006, i tried to sign on in the navy during BMT. But mindef was all too determined to have me in the Air Force.

So here i am, in Air Force School, always with a pack of super strong mints in my right breast pocket, trying to stay awake during lessons. But here, i am not alone. There was this ultra boring lesson where by at one point of time, the entire class fell asleep. All 43 of us. The female officer conducting the lesson had no choice but to declear a short break for us all.

All in all, life in here is like, a school with a hostel. With our 3 basic meals provided for us, enough time to watch TV in the night, a washing machine to share. And even a video arcade center and a KTV bar. It was far from a normal army life.

Been missed is those times when i lived with mother nature. Running for our lives under the rain, getting attack by batallions of ants, and of course, navigating to nowhere at an unknown place and the mass feeding of the mosquitos.

Humans really don't treasure anything until they lose them. Just like how my heart now aches for SOCs and field camp.

2006-11-19T02:09:00.000+08:00

For 5 weeks, i did not maintain my blog, you could even see the cob-webs forming on my blog.

Reason, out-field training.

This is done almost on a daily basis. And when weekends finally arives, i am too shag to even on the computer. During those times, i learned things that i thought never existed. Accomplished task and obstacle i never thought was possible to complete. For one thing, i cleared SOC at a time 9:29. Another thing is how i managed to go on a strict diet for 3 whole days back to back ( i still can't stand the stench of the combat rations ).

9 weeks of BSLC is over, at the 10th week, we'll all get our corporal rank. But there's nothing to rejoice yet.

If selected to be infantry spec, we'll need to endure another 10 weeks or so of madness, in the out field.

There, i will learn new things, discover new fears and conquer them. And more mosquito bites.

No wonder many say that boys will mature into man during NS. No dobut, they will dig out all your inner fears and force you to over come them. And during those times, i never felt more useless.

Yes, i'm still single and getting desprate. i almost went shopping for new games and clothes alone today. In fact the plan was to go alone. Until i bumbed into one of my platoon mates at beach road while getting my new rank sewed. With our rank sewed, we went brokeback at bugis junction to get polo T-shirts and for myself, a new pc game. It really struck hard at me on how much things i took for granted while i was still a student.

But while this thought has already hit me hard, i knew i couldn't cry out my mistakes and my sorrows at night. (The fact that there was 9 other people in my bunk was one reason).

Desprate as i can get, there will be nothing i can do. The cupids above can't simply be serving 5 billion people at one go. And i am convinced that they won't be serving me for at least another 2 years or so.

Maybe i should start bribing them.

2006-10-14T21:50:00.000+08:00

WHAT'S MY LINE?

A month of training has passed in SISPEC. I am very unsure if i can ever pass my course. For starters, my SOC performences is getting poorer by the day. From failing by a minute, to failing the many minutes, this is then followed by failling the swing trainner, followed by low rope. Finally, during the last SOC training of the week, i can't even climb the low wall. The supervising sergaent yelled at me to run and jump at the wall. I did and crashed to the wall.

It is wrong to say SISPEC is all physical and OCS is all mental. i still carry thick piles of lecture notes around, i still sat in classrooms, i still sat in lecture rooms, i still sat in computer labs, i still sat for theroy and practical test, and i still get caught sleeping in class.

Comes the poly days that i longed for, without the civilian clothes. And the fact that this is now an all boys school and we all wear green.

Friday the 13th is still prevalent in camps. On that day i seen one guy sprained his ankle during the day's SOC run, the fate of the failures of a therory test was spelt out. As for me, i dropped my rifle down the flight of stairs. there was three super loud thuds, followed by a ultra loud clang as the rifle smashed to the railings to the stairs, and a final thud as the rifle landed flat on the ground. This little incident caught the attention of the entire company and a nearby sergeant.

Luckily my balls was still intact and certified fit to particapate in the SOC that was to happen in the matters of seconds.

Through out my stay in SISPEC, my bed time is spent reflecting on myself. Like how i took everything for granted and remained carefree, like how engineering is not meant totally for me. If is not for my friends, i swear i'll never pass my course, especially at maths, eletronics, product designing, and C programming. Currently in my thoughts is what i'll do after army.

Well, i'll sort them out soon. Until then, i'll still be going through misadventures of all kinds. Up coming next week is a whole series of navagation stuffs.

2006-09-15T02:21:00.000+08:00

FIRST IMPRESSION REALLY COUNTS

My friends and i was walking along Scotts Road one day when we saw a few hotel staff, the door man and two police man on high alert outside a hotel, propably waiting for some very high profile guy. But what caught our attention was one of the police man.

With just one look, we knew he is a NS man doing some kind of guard duty. Here's why, he had this very burly look like as if he just woke up, looked bored and he's hunching his back.

As he look un-impressive, we made a joke amoung ourselves about him.

(Talking to ourselves)
"Eh boy! You miss-fire your gun izzit? So that's why you come for guard duty izzit? Ha ha!"

We then burst into laughter.

Haha.

And i did really learn from that incident. I may not have a girlfriend to impress, but that doesn't mean other girls won't look at me. Impression from guys is important too.

Anyway, girls and boys look at me all the time, especially if i'm in my army uniform. Kids that is. They never fail to look at me in my uniform from the playground whenever i come back from camp in saturday afternoons.

Oh well, kids impression is important too i guess.

2006-09-15T00:41:00.000+08:00

I AM STILL SCARED OF HEIGHTS

I realised that the hard way. At a water theme park called Wild Wild Wet. This is how it goes.

This ride is a 2 man ride called slide up. You bring a 2 seater blue float kind of thing up a tower, sit on it, and someone will push you off the tower, slide down the slope and by the kinentic energy, you slide up the next slope.

So there we were. i seat at the back while my friend seat at front. We were facing at each other. And the crew push us off.

When we started off the slope, we instantly went into a vertical terrifing drop. My weight of 65kg did not help. My 72kg friend did not help either.

I thought i was going to crash and get injured. So i sub-consciously let out a scream. The fact that we were seated at the wrong place gravitise the problem. See, as we went up the slope, my heaiver friend is now above me. By the law of gravity, we turned to such a way that now i'm at the top while he was at the bottom. and before i knew it, we were sliding down vertically again. I let out a second scream.

Little did i know those two scream sent all the crew, life guard and my army friends laughing away.

So i left the ride and went to play other attractions.

2006-09-10T02:19:00.000+08:00

ACHIEVING NEW HEIGHTS, CONQUERING NEW FEAR

Army belives in progressive training. This means, things will be longer or harder. When you thought it's the end of the world when you march 6km in full battle order, you end up finishing 24km route march. If you are scared of heights, you will still made it through the Jacob Ladder. And the list goes on and on and on and on and on..........

ROUTE MARCHES

It first start with a single SBO marching 3km. The next march will have an extra rifle to carry, Then Full Battle Order. Then the distance increase. 3km, 4km, 6km, 8km, 12km, 16km, 24km.

Commanders all say the most important thing here is the breathing. Take deep slow breath to prevent panting and tireing yourself out. But personally, i think the most important thing is water intake. Something that i mastered only during the 24km route march.

Mid-way during the 16km march, i had a drink too much, literally. If i couldn't sweat excess water out, i'll be punished by means of the bladder. As a result, i took an emergercy pee along the road side. I had so much pee, my platoon was about a good 50m ahead of me when i had finish. Of course, i ran back.

SOC

This is called standard obstacle course. Where your balls are put to the test.

Since i am afraid of heights, i naturally could not do the jacob ladder. Going up was easy. It is at the highest log when the trouble comes in. During, the training, my balls were so loose, i had to hold the PTI hands to walk up and down the jacob ladder.

But when the test came, i ran up and down with ease. Here's why, before you start to cross the low wall (SOC's first obstacle), you need to run 600m to reach it. It is here, that you realise how hard it is to scale a wall slightly taller that you. It is also here you can make the most painful of mistake. For me, when i reached the wall, i aimed to jumped far instead of high.

Luckily, the wall did not break. I simpily do not have enough money to pay for damages of a concrete wall.

2006-08-27T11:40:00.000+08:00

THE WORST 2 DAYS OF MY LIFE

Behold people! This is SIT test. The mother of all phobia for 3 days 2 nights.

THE WONDERFUL JOURNEY

You start with walking 12km to the camp site. With the hot sun above you. Without forgetting the really highly arched bridge we walked through. Once done, you immdiately pitch your litthe tent and continue field camp as usual. What we actually got back from the 12km walk is the super abrasion around the groin area. Walking like clumsy bears, we paitently waited for free time to powder our very reddish groin area. No words from the thickest dictionary in the world can explain the feeling of the prickly heat powder landing on the sore areas.

THE DAY I BECAME A LAWMAN

LAW is actually called Light Anti-tank Weapon. You have seen those heros. In Red Alert, Generals, Tiberian Sun. They effortlessly carried those countless amounts of rockets, running around and trash those tank to scrap metal.

I had only one round inside it's only launcher, plus they are all just dummies. And i thought it was the end of the world.

Weighing 6.3kg, i carried this dead weight with my other LAW buddy. (Wait. We both share that 1 bloody thing only.) We went about with our various missions. It was actually quite alright. Until when we started running for cover when enemy artlliery or sniper strike us. worse is when someone is shot. The officers never fails to choose the heaviest ones. This is where i swear that the 6.3kg weight becomes a mega ton.

And it is also where i embarresed myself by feeling giddy and nearly collasped due to heat stroke. This is serious. Please do not ever leave your water bottle half-full just because it's lighter. You never know when you need to seriously drink down to the last drop of it.

And comes the long awaited end of SIT test.

IT SOON BECAME 16KM

From the lesson above, i decided to drink up more. Really much more. However, as thr officers felt that the sun is too hot, they decided to delay the route march to the later part of the afternoon. By then, i had already drank up more than 1 and a half bottles of water. When we set of. It was far from hot. It was in fact windy and very cooling.

Extra water had to be coming out of the body in one way or another. If there's no heat to sweat it out, It has to come out out of the penis. And this is where i had a problem. While everyone is complaining of the up-hill slope. I was complaining of the absent of a mobile toilet. i had no choice but to hold on. While everybody is tired, i was very well, energtitic. When we reach our rest point, everyone was shagged out. Except me and a few others. We ran up the toilet area and happily pee ever after.

I thought i had learned my lesson. But i was far from wrong. At the 12km rest point, i felt too hungry. So i drank up two whole bottles of water while having my packed dinner. Same thing. i was cursing when the company slowed down their march as it was getting really dark.

Finally, i can hold no longer. I asked the sergent at the far end (he is the rear scout) for permission and pee at the road side double quick time. The sergent and a fellow recuit accopmanying him was shock to see so much pee coming out of me after learning that i had pee just before setting off from the 12km rest point.

That was it. We had march 16 km. Our legs is now filled with blister and we needed rest badly. But my day is still far from ended. As i had to report to CMPB for a test the next day at 9am, i was given permission to book out that night. This is actually a nighmare. i was suppose to catch the 10pm ferry when it was already 9:15pm. To make matter worse, i was appointed by the officer to inform the rest who needs to book out that night. Sure enough, i and two others missed the 10pm ferry by a few minutes and need to wait for the next ferry at 11pm.

Next day 9am came and the test i did was the same thing as the "Do this survey and pass down to 10 other people" kind of thing you will see in your friendster send message function.

2006-08-20T01:04:00.000+08:00

I DUNNCH TINK IT'S MY DAY

My grenede throwing is a flop.

This can be explained by over excitement. Or rather, the breaking of virgins.

It took me a bloody long time to twist the safety ring out. When finally done, threw out my grenede from the throwing bay. Only to land really off the target, closest to the throwing bay.

Not much need to be explained what happen soon after.

2006-08-12T23:19:00.000+08:00

THIS IS GUARD DUTY

Everybody is very eager to do it. But once the virginty is broken, they try all ways to avoid it. Welcome to guard duty.

Some will be conscripted into it. While some will need to perform mistake to earn it.

I was dead shag one day during field camp. I sat down on the floor with my rifile on my leg with the barrel facing the sky. It was also loaded with blanks. One ass-hole switch my rifile to auto, and by the curse of all mankind, i dared him to squezze the trigger. And he did just that. Two sergents began staring at us.

And we found ourself doing our part as a singaporean taking part in the nation's 41st birthday guarding an otherwise very well known island called Tekong.

The day began with a very early dinner, followed by the participting of the flag lowering session. After which, we march to the guard room to have our briefing. Once done, we will start guarding our well loved island.

My shift soon came. And i set out with my guard buddy. He was invited to guard duty as he dropped his magazine. And an officer was kind enough to pick it up for him. This also happened at field camp.

As we were not yet trained to fire live rounds yet, we were armed with a set of baton and riot shield.

We were allocated to be prowels. All we do is to walk all over the edges of BMTC 1 & 2.

It is here we were taught the hard way of how low a recuit life is. I saw a friend of mine, exchanged greetings and was screwed by his sergent.

Sergent: GUARDS!!!! GUARDSSSSS!!!! WHAT'S THE @%#!&%# TACTICAL DISTANCE???

We ignored him but my buddy and i started to distanced ourselves. Tactical distance is useful and important in case we were ambushed by enemies. In Tekong, it is the danger of the wild boars. Haha.

As we walked along the coastal areas of Tekong (it is were the O, T, W coy is) we heard fire works from the fire works vestival. Unfortuely, view was block by an zinc blockade to prevent recuits wandering into freshly reclaimed area. Only the sentries and those off duty get to watched them.

And soon, we grew bored with shoulders aching. To get over this, my buddy and i decided to hide somewhere to scare the other prowels walking the other direction. But we failed our mission.

The worst thing about guard duty is the bunk. When you are off duty, you rest in a stuffy bunk, filled with joss smoke smell coming fron the prayer room next door. Bed are so dirty, you will decide to sit on the chair and fall asleep on the table. To set your mind at peace, this is a list of things you may want to bring.

1. MP3 player for off duty uses.
2. Wet tissues for your oil filled face.
3. Toilet paper if you think you need to shit during guard duty.
4. Coins, you will need them if you are posted to do prowling.

Soon, guard duty ended on 6am, 9th August. But because the B coy who will take over us came late, we left the guard room for our F coy barracks only at 8:30am.

Without forgeting that our ferry is due to leave at 8:45am. With the fact that the guard room is beside the tekong ferry terminal and the F coy barracks is really really deep inside BMTC, marching is not an option. We had to run. And i really mean run. Put down our SBO, get our field packs, run to the ferry.

By some magical mystries, we made it on time. Only to come back on the very same day at 7pm.

When we arrived Tekong, we were greeted by the fire works display as we were alighting from the ferry. Many of us recuits stayed at the jetty to enjoy the small little romantic display of our country birthday by our country.

Happy 41st birthday, Singapore.

2006-08-06T11:53:00.000+08:00

SO YOU THINK YOU HAVE SEEN EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD

If this is what you think, you haven't been to field camp. 7 days, 6 nights on three different camp-sites, you will discover about yourself that you didn't know of.

PACKING YOUR BAGS

During stays overs at chalets, you are ususlly capaple of rolling up your clothes and squezzing them into your sling bags.

Here in field camp, you do the same. But with a set of thicker uniforms, a set of grey shirts and pants, underwears, sandles, and all your field camp equiment, and of course food, lots of food.

A great majority of us have problems squezzing into what could be seen as a small field bag. For me, my pants pockets will contain the lighter maggie mees while my bag will carry the heavier field rations. For my SBO (the thingy used to carry ammo) The smaller grenede pouch will contain my energy bar and the larger smoke grenede pouch will have my canned coffee given by the army. 2 of my magazine pouches became biscuit pouches. Thus, my field bag looks neat and tidy.

Only for a while. Back in the tent, i force compact everything into that darn bag. Crushing all the maggie mee and the biscuits.

ARE PIGS REALLY CUTE AFTER ALL

In almost all toy stores and love-birds gift shops, pigs are protrayed as a really cute loveable creatures, just look at little pigglet from Winnie the Pooh. To the great extend that almost all girls love them.

Welcome to field camp. You will see one for real as a wild boar. These creatures simply walk through the con-wire (these are long spirling wires with probally thousands of small sharp blade all over it). They than go straight to your bag, smell it, walk away to other tents, snatch away some poor recuits food, and walk away arrogantly. They starting moving around faster only after the sergents trew thunder-flashes at them. These creatures attack our camp site almost through out the first night. So much so that i slept soundly in my tent while those ugly hairy creatures were half-way into their rampage.

THE NEW MEANING OF PUBLIC TOILET

You know it. You shit in a whole during field camp. All you do is to do it once and you are put off for life. i shit only 3 times during the field camp where 2 times i did it at non-designated places. The first time i did was with one of my bunk mates and some from other platoons. Those from the other platoons did it at one random plot of empty non-grassy land. my bunk mate and i decided to go further as it look like a total mass-open-shiting-orgy.

So the two of us went across a bridge to the other side of the canal. Sastified with the location, we started digging our own hole where i stumbled across a pile of old decomposed dried shit. i nearly puked, but decided to continue anyway as i can hold no longer.

As the radom plot of poen non-grassy land i was talking about just now, it actually turned out to be our training area for that camp site.

The second time i did it was on the last night of that camp site. I went with 2 other friends. Since it was too dark so we went to the training area to do it. we digged and we did it. My torch was spoilt, so i used solid fuel that was provided for cooking of the maggie mee. The glowing of the fire light made the place a rather romantic atmosphere. Since the sky was clear, i saw defintiely the most beautiful star filled sky that lay above me.

That is until a sergent came by. They can be spotted from afar by their white LED torches. And we put out our little fire and went into stealth mode.

DIG DIG DIG

At the second last day, there is a personal trench you need to dig. it is about the size of you, look like a grave hole with another hole within that hole to put your bag into. Some were lucky. They got a second hand hole. Holes that has been dug up before and covered back. Others like me and a few of my poor fellow bunk mates had to dig a fresh ground near a tree. The soil stood firm, grass firmly rooted to the ground and while we dig, the roots of the nearby tree stood our way. All we can do is to suck our thumb as we chop those bloody roots away with our really, really down chunko stick called the ET blade.

Really, all the Blanga workers out there are really under paid and under appreciated. And here we are, making fun of them.